The plan was very simple. I made a list of what I would like from Aude for Christmas this year. At the top of the list was this:

Instead of a nice, new, shiny Corvette, what I got from Aude was this:

A stinking cold. So I’ve spent most of the day sitting at home feeling sorry for myself as I battle this case of ‘man flu’ with all the brave stoicism you’d expect. In other words, I’ve been whining all day.

In situations like this, I generally turn to the Jews. After all, the religion that brought us the Kosher hot dog and the word “schmuck” can’t be all bad. And they know a thing or two about curing a cold, so I’ve decided to self-medicate with Jewish penicillin – the theory being that chicken soup will cure all ails. And it turns out that there’s some medical evidence to back up this theory…

My favourite quote from the article: “It should be added that to benefit from Jewish penicillin, one need not be Jewish.”

A pot of chicken soup boiling on the stove. For any Jews making notes, the Goy version contains chicken, onions, carrots, celery, turnips, salt, pepper, bay leaf, and a bouquet garnis.

In other news, I’ve chosen the wine for our New Years Eve dinner. We’re spending the dinner with French friends in Brussels. Stubborn as I am, I’ve offered a French Chinon to go with the starter, but have stood my ground and selected a nice California Zinfandel, which should go nicely with our steak with Roquefort sauce.

A nice Chinon to go with our smoked duck salad, and a Californian Zinfandel to go with the main course.

Since this is likely my last blog of the year, I just thought I should wish everyone a Happy New Year! See you in 2007…

The rest of the trip was very much a combination of revisiting my old student haunts and celebrating our engagement. I’d put my organisational skills to work and the hotel were ready for us with a big suite, a plate of smoked salmon, and champagne on ice.

Our suite at the Old Course hotel, St Andrews

Champagne and smoked salmon

The bathroom sink was worthy of a photograph

Chromotherapy Jacuzzi. Or a fancy way of saying “Jacuzzi with coloured lights”, which proved important. The water in Scotland is brown because of all the peat in the soil, so you need the coloured lights to disguise it!

Aude, overlooking the Old Course

The final hole of the Old Course, with Hamilton Hall in the background

The Old Course

The Old Course

My legendary organisational skills were let down somewhat by dinner. Having failed to secure a reservation at the new seafood restaurant in St Andrews, I decided that I would wing it on the night. St Andrews in November – surely it wouldn’t be too busy?

Students must have more money than in my day – because the concierge at our five-star hotel couldn’t managed to get a table anywhere at all in St Andrews. We ended up eating at the hotel, which was actually a blessing in disguise. Aude had a superb piece of Scottish lamb and I had some wonderful venison, overlooking the Old Course.

We headed out onto the town and confirmed my thoughts – students definitely have more money than in my day. All of the bars have gone upmarket, wine-bar chic, which defeats the point. I can find that in London. St Andrews used to have loads of cozy bars with big fireplaces, but those are almost all gone. One or two remain, but they’re the exception rather than the norm. After a swift half pint in a couple of my old haunts, and a few aborted attempted at other old haunts which were now crap bars, we headed back to the hotel. We sat in the bar and drank single malt Scotch in front of a roaring fire. Just the way to end the night.

Reaffirming my belief in the Catholic faith — a priest who prays not to talk absolute shite when he’s sozzled:

Prayer for drunk teens

A new Catholic prayer book aimed at teenagers includes a prayer for God’s help to avoid talking rubbish when drunk.

“Lord, if in an unsober state, and under the influence of those around me, I say something stupid, please give me strength to retract my words. Protect me against senseless bravado and pride,” reads the prayer.

The book, released in Poland by Dominican monk Wojciech Jedrzejewski, has angered the Polish Catholic community as well as national media.

But Father Jedrzejewski stands by his work. He said: “This book will make it easier for young people to meet with God.””