After a long day of flying from the UK, with a very early start, Aude finally arrived in Istanbul early Friday evening. We headed down to Baghdad Street, on the Asian side, for a quick dinner of kebabs. Our cab driver was the worst that I’ve encountered in Istanbul – and that’s saying a lot. In the end, we got out and walked, fearing for both our lives and our stomachs if we continued on in the taxi.

I don’t know where this myth started about the Turks having great food. Sure, you can get your choice of lamb or chicken grilled to perfection at most places. But that’s about it for variety. Maybe a salad or some fish, grilled without any sauce. For the record, if I never eat Turkish food again, it will be too soon. The diet is one part of this country I certainly won’t miss. The Turkish have one of the highest smoking rates in Europe – nearly 90% of adults here smoke. And they have a correspondingly low life expectancy. But I suspect that their early death has nothing to do with their smoking – they smoke so they don’t have to eat their rubbish food, and eventually they face their millionth kebab and just give up the will to live.

Never mind. Aude had brought some champagne with her, so we had a few glasses and called it an early night back at the hotel.

Saturday morning, I hired a car and driver to spend the day with us. I did the same thing when I was in Sydney and Bangkok, and I remain convinced that this is the best way to see any city if you’re short on time. Our chauffeur whisked us off to the European side of Istanbul (via ferry, which was a nice way to get our first views of the old city) and then from one place to another, no waiting, no confusion, no language difficulties, and most importantly, no hassle. He even recommended a great fish restaurant for us at lunch. We had the terrace to ourselves, and had a great time watching the world go by.

Aude did a great job setting out our itinerary (I’m usually useless at things like this, and happily handed over the guide book and delegated all responsibility for planning our day, my role having ended at booking the car.) We took in all the big sights in the old city – the Topkapi Palace, the Aya Sofya, the Grand Bazaar, and the Egyptian Spice market. It was a great day out, and the weather stayed absolutely perfect for us.

I took loads of photos, but I’ve chosen a small handful for this website. I’ll stick the rest up later when I finally have some time.

Matt and Aude on the ferry from the Asian side of Istanbul to the European side

A group of Muslim women visiting the Topkapi Palace

There are cats everywhere in Istanbul. Here’s one of the little guys peering out of a fountain at the Palace.

Matthew standing outside the entrace to the kitchen at the Topkapi Palace.

The entrance to the inner courtyard at the Topkapi Palace.

Aude in the gardens of the Topkapi Palace, enjoying the perfect weather on a November morning.

Aude on the stairs in the gardens at the Topkapi Palace.

A view of the Asian side of Istanbul

One of the mosaic doorways at the Topkapi Palace

Lunch in an Istanbul restaurant

Fresh fish!

Aude outside the Aya Sofya

Aya Sofya

Aya Sofya. Clearly the signs didn’t apply to the cats.

Inside Aya Sofya

Inside Aya Sofya

The Blue Mosque

The Blue Mosque

Aya Sofya, looking fantastic in the setting sun

A balloon seller

The Grand Bazaar

Gold sellers at the Grand Bazaar

The Egyptian spice market

Uh oh! Aude needs to be on the lookout for counterfeit products — they’re everywhere!

Our first night out in Istanbul was a bit of a mixed bag, as we clearly struggled with both language difficulties and cultural norms. Based on the recommendation of the concierge at the hotel, we headed down to the harbour to find a restaurant. We didn’t have a specific place in mind, but we were told that there were plenty of good places and that we’d find one if we simply walked around the area.

After a few minutes of walking around, found a place that looked okay. There was a rather formidable woman in the window rolling dough and cooking something, and the place looked busy enough, so we went in.

Enticing us into a restaurant, Turkish-style

Our first struggle was ordering a few beers. We ordered beers, and they were brought out for us – but they were weak and warm. After using our best sign language to indicate that we’d prefer cold beer, we were presented with a bucket of ice cubes! At this point, we sort of gave up on the beer idea and decided to order some wine as well. After considerable misunderstanding, the guests at the next table kindly stepped in and explained that the restaurant was Muslim and therefore didn’t serve any alcohol – which explained why our (apparently non-alcoholic) beer tasted so terrible. We reverted to tea.

Matt and Swami tuck into a Turkish feast

The second problem was trying to explain that our colleague, Swami, was a vegetarian. The concept of a vegetarian is apparently unheard of in Turkey. After explaining politely to the waiter that ‘chicken’ wasn’t really a vegetarian option, we finally ended up ordering something from the big woman in the window – as best we can tell, it was some sort of bread with cheese and spinach. It wasn’t entirely successful, and Swami supplemented his dinner with a few bowls of peanuts at the bar we found afterwards.

Swami in the bar, enjoying a vegetarian diet of peanuts and beer…

We were drawn into the bar by the live music – which seemed like a good idea at the time. In fact, once you’ve heard the millionth song played on the lute with a dodgy Turkish singer, you’re about ready to shoot yourself. He kept turning to us and apparently asking for our requests, but as my Turkish is a little rusty, we weren’t able to comply. He seemed pretty disappointed that we weren’t singing along.

The taxi from hell…

Our taxi ride back to the hotel was a little hair-raising, even by Turkish standards. I suspect we should have been tipped off by the sticker on the side of the cab. Hanging from the rear-view mirror was a shark’s tooth, which indicates slightly more risk-taking behaviour on the part of the taxi driver than, say, a crucifix. We made it back in one piece, but we were definitely more ‘shaken’ than ‘stirred’.

The hotel we’re staying at is brand new, but quality control doesn’t seem to have factored into the equation. Everything is falling apart despite its newness. The light switches are all wonky. The tap on the sink doesn’t work property. The tap on the shower came off the wall when I tried to turn it on. The air conditioning in the conference room doesn’t work. And the lights seem to go on and off at random intervals, plunging our conference room into darkness. At least it adds some excitement to the day.

Finally, a moment of light relief. Realise, of course, that I don’t normally use a bidet. And that I didn’t really intend to use a bidet. But curiosity got the better of me, so I decided to see how the combined toilet / bidet worked. Fast forward to a jet of water shooting out across the bathroom and out into the hallway and frantic mopping up with towels. I’ll stick to toilet paper, thanks.

Aude at the old harbour in Antalya

Matthew at the old harbour in Antalya

Aude by the light of a lantern’s glow…

Our waiter, hard at work filleting the fish we’d ordered…

Matt relaxes over his dinner…

Matt isn’t the only one who thinks the fish looks good…

Another beautiful day, most of which we spent at the beach. The beaches here are pebble, the waves are strong, and the water gets deep very quickly, so not great for swimming. It was probably our first and last visit to the beach until we get to Cesme, where the beaches are sand and the water is more shallow.

My animal magnetism seems to be working overtime. I’d barely sat down for lunch before one of the ‘hotel’ cats was sitting in my lap. We’ve dubbed him ‘President Cataturk’. And the cats here have obviously worked out that I’m a soft touch as they’re constantly begging at my table (and seemingly not others!)

We had another good dinner overlooking the harbour, Aude managing to charm the waiter so much that we left with flowers. I’m considering buying her a burka.

Matthew at the old harbour in Antalya

Aude at the old harbour in Antalya

The view from our hotel room at the Sheraton Voyager Antalya

Aude ponders the world from atop a bridge at the hotel

Turkish coffee!

Turkish tea!

It’s a beautiful, bright morning in Antalya, Turkey, where we’ve spent the first few days of our honeymoon. After a few hair-raising moments in the rental car, I managed to find the hotel and dodge the worst of the Turkish drivers. The hotel, pool, beaches, and weather (30 degrees and sunny) are all perfect. We were met with champagne, flowers and the general honeymoon treatment.

The only thing raining on the parade is that I’ve managed to pick up a throat infection and have spent the morning at the doctor’s (for those of you who have never visited a doctor’s surgery in Turkey, it’s best to imagine something circa 1950s out of M*A*S*H – lot’s of hand-labelled glass bottles of disinfectant – it’s all a little scary, to be honest).

Aude has developed a pathological fear of the bees out here, which are the size of small birds, and has quickly abandoned her perfume.

Our biggest excitement seems to be the fact that no one believes that either of us live in England. Most assume we’re Turkish (helped, no doubt, by having spent a few weeks in the Mediterranean sun before we arrived), and those who don’t assume we’re Turkish guess Italian, Spanish, or German.

We had a nice meal last night overlooking the old harbour in Antalya – and had our first raki overlooking the port. No doubt we’ll be tired of kebabs by the end of two weeks here. The food has been universally excellent, but there’s a sameness to the cuisine here… We’ll see how we fare now that Ramadan has started – our dining choices may become more limited still.

We’ll be here for the next few days, then we’re off to the Aegean coast for five days there.